Trail Of Destruction. Stop Being A Victim!

Hey guys 🙂

In my last post I talked about the importance of seeing the positives of mental illness and bipolar remission in particular. Today I want to expand on that and talk about something that I notice a lot of people doing whether they have a mental illness or not and that is playing the victim.

Some people reading this are not going to like what I have to say and may feel I don’t truly understand their circumstances and that’s true, I probably don’t, but what I do understand is the longer you stay a victim of  your life, the further away you are from leading a healthy, stable and happy life and isn’t that what we all want? For some people, apparently not although they claim otherwise.

I stayed a victim for a long time. Especially before my diagnoses of bipolar disorder. Nothing was my fault and everyone else had the problem. I left a trail of destruction miles long and I insisted on staying that way.

The thing is, having a mental illness comes with plenty of challenges but that doesn’t mean it is an excuse to stay a perpetual victim. Truth is, whether you like it or not, there comes a point where you need to own your actions and you need to take responsibility for them. Stop living in the past. Stop playing the blame game and stop using your mental illness as an excuse for everything wrong in your life and for your actions. If you don’t have a mental illness, I know plenty of “normal” people doing the same damn thing.

Personally, I have to wonder if some people in general whether they have a mental illness or not stay a victim purely for attention. I don’t know if this makes sense but in some cases, people seem oddly content to be unhappy. They can talk the talk but they can’t walk the walk.

If you want to be happy in life you need to take a hard look in the mirror. Own up to the role you have played in your life and the role you have played in others lives. Stop being afraid of being happy! Forgive yourself and move on. Your mental illness does not have to define you! If I sound harsh to you then you are probably still playing the victim and if that’s what you want to be then expect nothing to change in your life.

As Einstein said…

The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting the same result. 

So yeah, if you want to stay the victim, that is exactly what you will be. If all you want out of life is a pity party…trust me that gets old fast and you can expect people to give up on you just as quickly and rightfully so!

Own your mental illness, own your life! If you truly want to get on the path of a more stable life you need to work for it and you need to truly want it.

I am not trying to say you are not allowed to have bad days…we all have them and with mental illness it can be that much harder to stay positive at times and I am not trying to take that away from anyone. All I am saying is if you want your life to change…you need to change. It really is that simple.

Take Care! ❤

Cavelle

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5 thoughts on “Trail Of Destruction. Stop Being A Victim!

  1. It is intresting that you mentioned Einstein’s definition of insanity. Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results is nearly a daily occurrence in my experience. Sometimes instead of insanity I look at it as unrelenting optimism. It seems that your wish is to will people into bipolar stability by telling them not to play the victim. Tough love is not ok in my world. It seems that at times people use it for an excuse to be brash, a tad rough around the edges.Tough love is not love. Being argumentitve to my fellow suffers is not normal for me. This topic is a trigger for me, my mom was all about tough love,and I never felt that she even cared about me. Being the victim constantly is not helpful to our mental health, yet we need to be understanding and gentle with ourselves. Loving and respecting the weaker parts of our soul is vitally important. Thank you for giving your readers a light at the end of the tunnel! Stability living within the bipolar spirit is nothing short of a miracle. Take care.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you I appreciate your comment. We do need to be loving and gentle with ourselves but to me mental illness is not a weakness. I consider myself a stronger person for it but it has taken years to see it that way. I am glad you mentioned a light at the end of the tunnel because that is more or less what I am getting at and in order to get even close to stability it takes proper care and support which in itself was challenging to finally get it. I do apologize if my post was triggering for you. I want you to know that I do care and that is why I was passionate about this post. I will always be in a state of recovery as bipolar disorder is not going anywhere and I will have times where medication and therapy will not always be enough to avoid mania and depression but while I am in a good state I just want people to see there is so much more to us than the person with a mental illness. I want to rise above stigma by not caving to the stereotypes and proving to myself and perhaps others there is strength not weakness in owning who we are mental illness and all. Thank you for opening up a discussion I truly do appreciate it.

      Liked by 1 person

      • I understand where you are coming from. We are all so different and in all the stages of our illness. It’s hard enough for people without these problems to communicate delicately. I am glad you are in a good place and I wish only the best for you. I am in the overly sensitive big baby stage right now so I apologize. You have an excellent blog and I meant in no way to discourage that. It’s good to have friends who see things differently then we do. I think I needed to hear a strong voice that day, even if I did pout about it.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I love your mix of pragmatism and optimism in this post. Being the victim is a role too many find too easy to fill. It really does make us crazy when we are not willing to take control of our lives through beneficial action. Our intentions must include a desire to be stronger, smarter, and loving of ourselves and others.

    Liked by 1 person

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